family
As you all know, I'm a lonely only. This situation was great when I was a kid - but now, as I get older, I often wish I had brothers and sisters. And I often wonder what my siblings would be like if I had any. (Or aunts, uncles, and cousins for that matter -- my parents are only children, too) Sometimes, when I meet new people, I find ones who seem to have the kinds of qualities I think my siblings would have -- as though they are a mesh of me and my parents, yet have a prevalence of one characteristic or another. Or I love to find other people who are only children and bond over that fact. It's just a life-long "what if?" for me.
Considering my only-child status, my in-laws think I'm a strange bird because I'm simply not used to the kinds of teasing, slamming, and intense relationship negotiating that goes on among siblings. When Topher teases his younger sister Abby, I'm always shocked, don't say that to your sister! I hiss. And they BOTH look at me like I'm the offending agent. I just don't get it.
But I married into a wonderful (and larger!) family. You may remember seeing some of them at our wedding -- especially Tina, Topher's beautiful, BEAUTIFUL sister who tackles anything, anytime, anywhere and just gets it done. I often stand in awe of what I see her accomplish for her family -- and she's the most wonderful hostess at our gatherings. She and her husband Qais live in Naperville (near Chicago) and have two daughters, Tibet and Zainah -- and I love hearing "Aunt Lesley" (I mean, I had no idea I might EVER hear that - and it just sounds nice.) They are both very creative and intelligent -- Tibet is even an aspiring writer! So we always talk books, and they remind me what it was like to really love books as a kid. Topher's other sister Abby lives in Boston -- she's very much like her brother, so we always have lots to talk about concerning literature, what we've read, etc. Of course, she's very much like her brother, so she likes to tease me a little -- nothing I don't deserve. :) Topher's mom (no picture below, sorry!) is a great mother-in-law -- she and her boyfriend Larry live in north Topeka. When we visited for the 4th of July last summer, she made me a dress in a day while we were staying there! And I mean, the dress rocks -- bold stripes, halter top, cocktail party dress. Her new job has been making dresses/clothing to sell, and she has an amazing knack for it. But it's so nice to have more family, sisters and nieces! I like knowing that the holidays are a big affair -- a nice contrast from the quiet intimate holiday gatherings of my childhood.
This Thanksgiving, my parents will join us all in Naperville -- btw, this tradition started two years ago when Toph and I hit a deer and totalled our car on the journey back to Kansas. We weren't hurt, but no more car! So my parents made the trip to Illinois last minute, and we all spent Thanksgiving Day with Topher's family. I was nervous about it initially, but it ended up being a great holiday. Just like me, my parents enjoyed knowing that they were now a part of a larger family.
Qais and Tina Azar, Tibet Azar, Qais's mom (visiting from Jordan!), Abby Allen, Zainah Azar, Toph and me, last Thanksgiving
Considering my only-child status, my in-laws think I'm a strange bird because I'm simply not used to the kinds of teasing, slamming, and intense relationship negotiating that goes on among siblings. When Topher teases his younger sister Abby, I'm always shocked, don't say that to your sister! I hiss. And they BOTH look at me like I'm the offending agent. I just don't get it.
But I married into a wonderful (and larger!) family. You may remember seeing some of them at our wedding -- especially Tina, Topher's beautiful, BEAUTIFUL sister who tackles anything, anytime, anywhere and just gets it done. I often stand in awe of what I see her accomplish for her family -- and she's the most wonderful hostess at our gatherings. She and her husband Qais live in Naperville (near Chicago) and have two daughters, Tibet and Zainah -- and I love hearing "Aunt Lesley" (I mean, I had no idea I might EVER hear that - and it just sounds nice.) They are both very creative and intelligent -- Tibet is even an aspiring writer! So we always talk books, and they remind me what it was like to really love books as a kid. Topher's other sister Abby lives in Boston -- she's very much like her brother, so we always have lots to talk about concerning literature, what we've read, etc. Of course, she's very much like her brother, so she likes to tease me a little -- nothing I don't deserve. :) Topher's mom (no picture below, sorry!) is a great mother-in-law -- she and her boyfriend Larry live in north Topeka. When we visited for the 4th of July last summer, she made me a dress in a day while we were staying there! And I mean, the dress rocks -- bold stripes, halter top, cocktail party dress. Her new job has been making dresses/clothing to sell, and she has an amazing knack for it. But it's so nice to have more family, sisters and nieces! I like knowing that the holidays are a big affair -- a nice contrast from the quiet intimate holiday gatherings of my childhood.
This Thanksgiving, my parents will join us all in Naperville -- btw, this tradition started two years ago when Toph and I hit a deer and totalled our car on the journey back to Kansas. We weren't hurt, but no more car! So my parents made the trip to Illinois last minute, and we all spent Thanksgiving Day with Topher's family. I was nervous about it initially, but it ended up being a great holiday. Just like me, my parents enjoyed knowing that they were now a part of a larger family.
Qais and Tina Azar, Tibet Azar, Qais's mom (visiting from Jordan!), Abby Allen, Zainah Azar, Toph and me, last Thanksgiving
posted by Lesley at 3:45 PM
2 Comments:
What a great family you married into!
I know it's always been overwhelming for anyone I've dated to take them to family gatherings. My immediate family is not very intimidating, but my extended family is SO loud and boisterous. (One of the things I loved about being in Chicago was being close to all of them for the holidays.) Tim is used to the holidays with his mom and sis, but we're trying to enfold them as well into one big happy--and arguing, shouting--family.
And next year, I'll be so much closer so we can visit, too!
Your family sounds fantastic, Lesley. I'm so happy that you're not a "lonely only" anymore. :)
When i was a kid, i had moments where i was really happy that i had a brother... and at times, really dreaded the fact, too. And i'm quite sure the feeling was mutual! Eh, garrett? Ehhhhhh? *That feeling of the world bouncing up and down underneath you is the effect of garrett's head nodding in agreement at an amazing speed* :)
But over the years, i've realized how lucky i am to have him and love him so much... i wouldn't give him up for the world.
... but if you offered me a ready and willing Johnny Depp in his skivies, i MIGHT take a second to rethink it. :) *Just kidding, garrett!*
And as far as the teasing goes... that just comes with the sibling territory. I KNOW you'll get used to it... you can adapt to anything! And if you need any help, Garrett and I will be MORE than happy to tease and slam you... uh, for the shear experience of growing accustomed to it, of course!
Post a Comment
<< Home